One of the most taboo subjects to speak about with any generation regardless of their age is the subject of pornography. Contrastingly, it is estimated that about 16% of women and 46% of men view sexually explicit content within a weekly average. While it is impossible to verify the accuracy of such stats, it is still a pointer to the larger epidemic and cancer in the underbelly of our society.
In the digital economy, almost everyone including adults and children can access devices such as smartphones and computers. While technology is always a blessing, it comes with a dark underside, one of these being the easy accessibility of pornographic material, even to young kids.
Join us in this quick read as we explore one of the most sensitive issues humanity currently faces. We’ll dig deep into the pervasive issue of pornography and, more importantly, discuss practical steps to break free from its grip.
What Do the Studies Show?
According to a recent study authored by Michal Privara, MA, and Petr Bob, Ph.D., and published by the NIH, pornography is a growing area of concern particularly in the male population.
Due to the internet becoming freely available, as well as the use of privacy and anonymity tools, porn viewership has widely increased. According to the study, porn becomes a problem when it becomes compulsive in itself and leads to other compulsive behaviors. So, if you’re a college student facing a stressful deadline and thinking “How will I write my papers in such a short time?”, the stress of that event can lead to the consumption of porn, resulting in a negative endless cycle.
Studies such as the one earlier quoted have found that consumption of porn is widely correlated with stressful experiences, anxiety, and depression. Porn is detrimental to people’s health and it should be treated as a tragedy.
Negative Effects of Pornography
Though glorified by the erotica industry as a means to “sexual liberation” and being in tune with our sensual selves, the truth is much darker. Studies have shown that porn has detrimental mental effects on the viewer, and it’s doubtful that any studies show its positive side.
Watching Porn Isn’t Natural
Porn dismantles intimacy right at its core. Think about it; sex is a deeply intimate and almost sacred act, laying the groundwork for human connections. Unfortunately, pornography often shatters the genuine intimacy, love, connections, and even trust that undergird our relationships. Porn is clearly not intimacy and it sets unattainable expectations that can erode the bonds between partners.
Chasing the Dopamine High
Porn is like a drug, and once you get started you might be in that rabbit hole of addiction for a long, long time. The experience of watching porn is similar to chasing a never-ending dopamine high. Your emotions are on a rollercoaster, where you feel elated during the act but crash hard afterward. The guilt and shame that often accompany pornography can leave you feeling worse, eroding your self-confidence.
As with any high, once the dopamine wears off and you’re back to sea level, then all sorts of problems occur. You’re looking for your next fix and that is all that you can think about. Suddenly, nothing else matters unless you get the next dose. A vicious cycle that might take seasons to overcome.
Draining All Aspects of Life
Engaging with porn over a lengthy period is sure to leave you drained emotionally, physically, mentally, and even spiritually. That’s literally every part of you that’s affected by porn.
It saps your energy and leaves you feeling emotionally drained, rendering you unable to enjoy life and the beauty of it. It can be an energy drain so profound that you might lose the motivation to socialize, hit the gym, or even maintain the confidence for genuine eye-to-eye contact.
Adverse Impact on Relationships
Remember, porn is not real. It’s just a Rated R+ movie for your entertainment, often to your detriment. The portrayals of sex in pornography can set unrealistic expectations for real-life intimate encounters. Suddenly, you’ll need your partner to perform to such expectations different from before, which will not only demoralize them but it will also make them lose trust in you.
This discrepancy can lead to dissatisfaction in relationships, as partners may struggle to perch to the “high bar” set by the actors in these films.
Also, studies have shown that people who watch porn face difficulties becoming sexually aroused without watching erotica. The person may completely lose interest in their partner, resulting in sexual dissatisfaction by one party. That’s not something that you want to happen to you or your partner.
Low Self-Esteem
Once you’ve started watching porn, you can’t “unsee” what just happened, and the more you look at it, the more your perception of reality becomes warped. Suddenly, your self-esteem takes a dive and your standards lower. You start believing that “that” is what people want in bed. You change into a different person. The psychological strain can become unbearable knowing that you can be better but just aren’t making the cut.
While masturbation is a natural and healthy part of human sexuality, pornography can lead to excessive, compulsive habits. Studies have shown that excessive masturbation is linked to depression, low energy, anxiety, and mood swings. Moreover, it can desensitize you, making it challenging to maintain arousal during intimate moments with your partner.
Mental Health Problems
As the studies published by the NIH that we quoted earlier suggested, pornography is correlated to increased stress, which effectively means other conditions such as anxiety, low self-esteem, and depression. That immediate gratification it offers often masks the deeper psychological wounds it inflicts, or that have been inflicted in the past on the person.
Objectification and Misogyny
We’ve often read dark tales about the past concerning how women were often brutalized and turned into leisurely objects for the satisfaction of male ego and testosterone. About how women and girls were stripped naked and paraded like Queen Cersei’s walk. Female objectification has always been a problem in a male-dominated world (thank God for 2023!)
Dehumanizing individuals for sexual pleasure, whether children, male or female, is something that should be eliminated completely from the human psyche. The objectification of women especially leads to a culture of violence and disrespect, and can even damage relationships between the sexes.
Negative Sexual Behaviors
Man, after all that erotica high, you surely must get some outlet to vent and release the pressure, right? If you don’t have a faithful partner who you are intimate with, chances are you will end up masturbating (which can be healthy or negative, depending on how you look at it), or you’ll get a sexual partner for convenience.
Suddenly, you’re back to having one-night stands and unprotected sex, or even going back to some not-so-fancy places. You may even end up having multiple sexual partners which leads to increased exposure to STDs and such.
That should serve as a wake-up call to protect your sexual health and relationships.
Exploitation and Trafficking
Have you seen or heard of Jim Caviezel’s Sound of Freedom released earlier this year? you’ll see elements of child sex trafficking and even kids ending up in a porn sort of digest. That’s the darkness of our world.
The porn industry is linked to prostitution, exploitation, slavery, child sex trafficking, and even drug and alcohol abuse. You need to keep that in mind every time you smash that big ol’ red button and hit Enter.
How to Deal with Pornography
Recognizing just how dangerous pornography is to your wellness and health in all its dimensions is crucial from when you’re a youth. These are the years when you should be feeling beautiful, full of life, and free from the shackles of addiction.
Here are a few techniques you can use to beat that urge to watch erotica again:
- Identify Your Triggers – Begin by keeping a detailed journal to identify your triggers. What situations or emotions lead you to pornography? This is the first step to beating it.
- Blockers on Devices: Download website blockers if you have to. Set parental controls on your laptop if you have to.
- Mindfulness Practice: Once you’ve identified your trigger, you can then use mindfulness practices to take control of your mind and time. These can include meditation, reading or even changing your scene.
- Get into physical activity or a hobby: even without the option of porn, you should always have something that takes you outside your regular space. This can be a hobby like music, or even fitness and gyming.
Finally, seek help from the Divine, but only if you believe it. Read an inspired book such as the Bible and seek the wisdom of the wise.
Mental Health Experts and CBT
This is really for those who feel like porn is something that is now like a heavy blanket upon them. Talking to a therapist can help you identify any deep psychological reasons that underpin your addiction. But these things are taboo, so how would you talk to anyone about it, you may ask?
Well, seeking help from a professional, such as a therapist or counselor, is a courageous and essential step. It means you are fighting back to reclaim what you have lost.
Final Words
Now there, don’t feel sad or ashamed. Remember that these are things that all men grapple with. What’s more important is to be yourself again and emerge back stronger. Think about this issue and weigh it on the scales. Does it take more from you than it gives? If it does discard with immediate effect.
When you do break free, it will be the best reward you can give yourself. You will be able to stand tall knowing that you overcome a powerful enemy, and that has overpowered many like yourself. Good luck!
