A lot of people are saying that the song is vengeful. Others are saying that it’s just exposing the truth. What was your intent when writing the song? What kind of conversation do you hope it starts?
I don’t know if anyone truly knows how hard it was releasing this song. I must make it perfectly clear that I wrote this as a cathartic, therapeutic way to get me through a lot of things I was struggling with emotionally at the time.
There is absolutely no vengeance or anger at all. When I finally got home from the show, I locked myself in my studio and went through this title wave of emotions: I cried, yelled, laughed and then I just splurged and wrote and wrote and wrote. I probably wrote enough songs to fill 2 albums. I forgot to eat, sleep, bathe, etc. I was so wrapped up in the writing process. I am a songwriter and I use my past experiences in my art. Heartbreak comes in many forms. The song is pretty autobiographical, and yes…to the point. I have to be truthful with my fans and I will never lie to them. I think that they know that and it strengthens my bond with them. I made sure to include this statement as part of my video description…
“First of all, I just want to start off by saying thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you SO much to everybody who has supported me throughout my psychotic journey. I know I’ve been MIA for a minute. Turns out I was going through a lot and I needed to collect my thoughts and write it all out on paper. So I did…and I was incredibly nervous about sharing this. It took a lot of courage to put this song out, because I have no idea how everyone will react. I don’t want anybody to get the wrong idea. I am beyond grateful for my experience this past year. The love and support has been surreal and an absolute dream come true. I would do it all again in a heartbeat. I’ve made the best friends, a whole new family, and most importantly I found all of you guys. You’ve helped me heal, you’ve inspired me to grow as an artist and a person, and you make me feel empowered. That being said, I feel that it’s really important for me to be honest with all of you. To me, that’s what art is: honesty. So as we enter the new year, I want to share my story with all of you. It’s the closest I can give you to a backstage pass. So before I move on and turn the page into my next chapter, I need this closure. I know not everyone will agree with me or like what I’m doing. But, I feel like God put me on this planet to make a difference…To make people think and see what the naked eye sometimes can’t. It’s my job as a songwriter to write from the real and not-so-comfortable places in my heart and I hope I can inspire other people to embrace their Broken Road. I love you guys and I owe you my world. Thank you for giving me this therapeutic opportunity. Onward and upward…to 2016.
This is my truth. “
So I wrote La La Land with the intent to be truthful and honest, and (for my own selfish reasons) to get closure on a very important and amazing time in my life. At the end of the day, it’s just a simple pop song that hopefully makes people sing along or dance or just smile for the three minutes it’s on their radio.
Like Mick Jagger said: “It’s only rock n roll but I like it.”
Has your musical style changed or evolved since you left the show?
At the end of the day, I am a pop singer and I want to make really enjoyable pop records.
My musical style changes every hour depending on different life experiences, really. I’m a pretty inconsistent writer.
In the morning I’ll write a dance song, in the afternoon I’ll write a totally heartbreaking ballad. I’m moody! A lot of the music I plan on releasing comes from a state of serious true love and heartbreak and really just my entire year. I am born and raised on rock and pop, and I like some elements of dance and electronic music. But the truth is, I find nothing more honest than sitting at my piano and telling a story. My style is evolving day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, and I’m excited for the fans to grow with me and connect with me on a whole new level. I want my music to move people…happy or sad, angry or confused, love or hate, however it hits you, as long as it hits you hard.
What kind of career do you hope to lead? What can we expect next from you?
Career is a big person’s word.
I’m so lucky that my job is doing what I love.
There has never been a Plan B for me.
I feel like everybody has this tiny little block of time in this universe to make a mark…and for me, music is my purpose.
Making people feel good is what I want to do. I will measure my success one beautiful smile at a time. I never expected this to turn into something so much bigger than me.
We’ve really developed this incredible movement of people embracing their weirdness and inner beauty. It would be wrong to stop now.
You can expect me to make more music, perform live, hang out with this crazy family of mine called the Jax Pack. You can expect me to help people realize that “X” is the undefined quotient in each one of them, that which makes each one of them uniquely special in their own wonderful way. Expect me to be a total studio rat. I’ll be creating and releasing music this year and forever. I’m so excited to see what 2016 holds.
I feel stronger than ever and I am flying high. The love has been overwhelming and I thank God everyday for giving me the chance to make a difference.
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