By: Avanti Giridharan
In today’s day and age, the definition of femininity has changed drastically. Yet being a lady never goes out of style, though the perceptions may change with time. Being a lady is something all women can aspire to.
But how to reconcile being ladylike in today’s society? By being a modern lady! Earlier in time, ladies were women of wealth and high social rank. That’s not the case anymore. A modern lady is an accomplished, empowered, high-caliber woman.
WHO IS A MODERN LADY?
The best way to embrace womanhood today is by being a modern lady. It empowers women to fulfill their potential and become the best versions of themselves. Contemporary Ladies are intelligent and confident. At the same time, they’re compassionate, well-behaved and true to their principles. The way to do that is through self-improvement and a willingness to learn.
HOW TO BE A MODERN LADY?
Every woman can acquire the skills necessary to become a lady. Here are a few guidelines:
1. Dress to Impress: The way you present yourself is the key to being perceived well. Your dressing reflects your standards and efforts, so it’s important to dress well. You can do this by investing in high-quality pieces that fit well. One can never go wrong with the classics (white shirt, tailored trousers, form-fitted black dress etc). Layer yourself well and make sure that your clothes are freshly cleaned and steamed/pressed. Take care to wear something which is suitable for the event and the weather outside. Don’t forget about being confident and comfortable in what you wear.
2. Watch your Mouth: Your speech is just as important as your dressing sense. A Lady communicates clearly, coherently and precisely without getting into unnecessary details. Don’t demean or insult other people by passing judgements. I’d recommend that you leave discussions of sex, religion and politics among your close friends or family and not bring them up in public gatherings. You may want to avoid swearing in public. A few cuss words among best friends is one thing, but swearing openly is a big no! Your goal is to sound refined, not crass.
3. Commit like a boss: Commitment is the driving force of improvement. Commit to your principles, regardless of the temptations in that situation. Achieving your goals requires dedication. You can do this by valuing your time, managing it, taking a couple hours to rest and making a daily schedule. Don’t forget: A lady sets her standards and doesn’t lower them for anyone by settling for less.
4. Awareness: “Being informed and aware is sexy”. Update yourself with current affairs and form your own opinion. Make sure to prioritize rationality and civility in all discussions. It’s advisable to pick up some books, to acquire a taste in reading. If you wish, it could be even journals, magazines or newspapers. Cultivate a few hobbies which will relax you and round off your personality (Gardening, music, art….. it could be literally anything). Willingness to learn is your best shot at knowledge.
5. Stretch out a hand: Since the beginning, the term ‘Lady’ has been synonymous with compassion and charity. Kindness and empathy are the essence of ladylike behavior. Being a lady doesn’t mean hurting, using or looking down on others. It means caring about the people around you, being there for them and helping when you can. To love and be loved in return does wonders for the society.
6. Confidence: You can’t be a lady if you’re not confident about becoming one. This entails being true to who you are without desiring to be someone else or following other people blindly. Self care and healthy habits are a must. Ladies, you have to respect yourself and your standards before you do the same for others. You’ve taken initiatives and are doing your best to level up. Have hope and pride in the wonderful woman you’re becoming. Embracing your strengths and improving upon your weaknesses is a sure shot to self confidence.
7. Social Media Etiquette: The main difference between ladies of olden days and modern ladies is their usage of social media. It may not have existed earlier, but it’s certainly a big deal today. Believe it or not, there’s a code of conduct for appropriate use of online websites and social media called ‘Netiquette’. It goes without saying that modern ladies are recommended to follow through with these.
They’re actually pretty basic. “Don’t post other people’s pictures or information online without prior permission’’ ‘’Don’t share people’s contact details without asking them first’’ ‘’Respect other people’s online privacy’’ ‘’Don’t pressure people to reply constantly’’ ‘’Don’t send unsolicited or vulgar texts’’ ‘’Identity theft and plagiarism aren’t permitted’’. Spending all your time on social media and revealing every detail of your life isn’t a very good idea. Nothing we didn’t already know, but often tend to forget. Just keeping this in mind will do wonders for your online safety and privacy.
8. Behavior: Ladies, your behavior can make or break your reputation. Be polite and courteous towards other people. Cultivating the art of hosting goes a long way. Learn to be well-mannered and compose yourself because, nobody puts a lady in a corner. Now, I’ll be the first to admit that it initially requires a lot of fist clenching and tongue biting. But your reputation and self respect will thank you for it.
In heated situations, take a deep breath, be still and speak after a couple of minutes. This will help you remain cool and calm. A modern lady respects etiquette and doesn’t let herself be swayed by jealous haters. Whatever the temptation, DON’T debase yourself by giving in to your basal urges. People will respect the integrity and self-control that sets you apart. It may require some work, but it’s worth it.
It’s a common misconception that ladies are stiff, rigid perfectionists. On the contrary, modern ladies celebrate their strengths and learn from their mistakes. They’re flexible and can adapt to situations by making the best out of them. Being a modern lady means being the best woman you can be. Modern ladies are unique women with high personal and professional pursuits who will conquer the world.
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