Most of us think that fighting can end relationships; however, fighting can actually be healthy. To be specific, disagreements and fights can make a relationship thrive. In fact, it can create a pathway so that you and your partner can develop a deeper connection. Even so, there is a limit when it comes to fights. If you’re having toxic fights, then it is not good for your relationship. So, how often do normal couples fight and what are some ways to avoid fighting too much?
How Often Do Normal Couples Fights?
Experts believe that there is no right or wrong number of fights to determine if your relationship is healthy or toxic. Instead, you can look at the type of fight you’re having with your partner. To be precise, fights that are fair and productive are healthy. Remember, healthy fights are not about winning. Instead, they are arguments that end in a resolution.
Ways to Avoid Fighting Too Much
1. Take a Break and Calm Yourself
When we fight with our partner, we often say things that we don’t mean, then feel regretful afterward. Unfortunately, having intense emotions during a fight may escalate things, making the conflict worse. As a solution, you can walk away from the fight, take a break, and calm yourself. Once you’ve regained a rational state of mind, you can come back to discuss the situation with your partner. Through this, you can end the fight with a solution instead of making it worse.
2. Be Attuned with Yourself
One of the best ways to avoid fighting too much is to be attuned with yourself. In doing this, you will learn to be mindful of your thoughts and actions. As such, when you and your partner fight, you’ll be able to control your reaction and be calm. But, you have to learn to be mindful of your thoughts and actions. There are several mindfulness exercises you can practice to be attuned with yourself.
One exercise you can do is RAIN. To do this, you can recognize the situation. Afterward, you can accept what’s going on. The next step is to investigate the experience and ask yourself how it triggered your emotions. Finally, the last step is non-identification, which means that you should not allow yourself to over-connect with the situation or experience.
3. Remember the Important Things
The last on this list of ways to avoid fighting too much is to remember the important things in your relationship. You can go back to the past and remember why you love your partner. Keep in mind that your love for each other is the most important thing in your relationship. As long as you love each other, you can resolve any conflict and grow.
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