Today, women are considered equal to men in almost all areas of life. So, should women be considered equal when it comes to affairs of the heart? For example, do you consider it appropriate for a woman to ask a man out on a date? Traditionally, this was a role dedicated almost exclusively to a man. However, is this still considered true by today’s standards? After all, if there is true equality between the sexes, why can’t women have the same rights as a man?
Why shouldn’t they be able to ask a man out if they feel like it?
Perhaps this is the wrong question to ask. Yes, we can do just about anything we want to when it comes to the world of dating. However, you must understand that just because you ask a man out, doesn’t necessarily mean you will get the results you desire. Why? Men like to pursue. And they like the opportunity to show interest. Guys will do what they want to do. If they want to ask you out, they will. If they are not interested, they won’t. Let’s face it; they don’t need your help in asking you out.
Sure, you can pursue anyone you wish. But understand that you might be pursuing someone who is not interested in you and that is futile in the long run. Even if they say yes, there might not be a tremendous amount of interest in you. Oh, they may sleep with you, but not offer much more than that.
And yes, there are exceptions to the rule. There are guys that are so passive you have to ask them out or at least help them along. But chances are, they are so passive and shy, you won’t be interested in them anyways.
Remember, if they want to ask you out, they will. Some women will think, “Maybe he just doesn’t know I’m interested in him, or maybe he’s just too shy.” Sorry, this just doesn’t happen. Type A women want to control and pursue and this is the type that finds allowing a man to chase most difficult. For men, the chase is vital to the initial stages of a relationship. Patti Stanger, the Millionaire Matchmaker said, “Look, I’m not going to pussyfoot around here. You know I think men should do the asking when it comes to dates. It’s just nature. Men are hunters, and facts are facts. Men like to go after what they want.so no, it’s not okay for women to ask men out.”
Patti is saying, if men are interested, they will ask you out.
If they are not interested, they will not ask you out. If you back off from pursuing someone and they are not initiating anything, it will become really clear quickly; he is not interested. So, more often than not, pursuing a man is not a good idea.
Also, making yourself too available for a man who is not interested, “being there” for him or wanting to develop a friendship in hopes of it changing into something else later is not good for you. This man is not interested in you, so why would you be putting forth energy in the wrong direction? Instead, you should be putting it in another direction that will benefit you instead of making you look desperate. Malina Bickford, in her essay, “Why I’ll Never Ask a Guy Out” said, “When a guy wants something or someone, his instincts tell him to GO GET IT. It’s just the natural order of things.”
You can do whatever you want to do when it comes to the world of dating; however, know that when you actively pursue a man, you upset the balance of what nature intended since the beginning of time. There is no point. Let him pursue. After all, if he likes you enough, he will engage you. If not, you are wasting your energies on the wrong person.
