What weird things set long-term couples apart from newbies?
Considering I’ve known my partner since 1993, I can say that we’ve almost seen and been through it all. Although life constantly presents new and unique challenges each and every day, we’ve developed our odd and quirky relationship as most long-term couples do. Things develop organically and before you know it, you’ve entered into the realm of being a “kooky long term couple”. Here are some bizarre things that long term couples do that only they think are normal.
- Go to the bathroom in front of each other.
Not only do you go to the bathroom in front of each other, you will continue having the conversation you were engrossed in while one of you is going to the bathroom. You might even scratch the head of the person sitting on the toilet while they are doing their morning constitution. Or worse yet, together you inspect what is in the toilet afterward.
- Develop your own verbal language
Similar to twin speak, you two have created your own language that no one else understands. Whether it is simply shortening words or creating completely new ones, you both get the gist of what is being said when everyone else thinks you are bonkers.
- You can communicate without verbally speaking.
This type of communication can consist of a series of movements, gestures, or looks. My partner and I can speak through a series of taps from finger to leg. I know what he is saying, if he is impatient and wants to leave, or if he needs something.
- You can“read” each other’s minds
With Long-Term Couples, all you need to do is give your partner a certain “look” and you know exactly what they are thinking, good or bad.
- Sniff each other to see if one smells or not
Most people would be grossed out at the idea of “smell checking” another. However, some couples not only do this on a regular basis, they actually get into it!
- Treat pets as children
Dogs, cats, turtles and rabbits often become children to you and you treat them as such.
FYI, my partner allows our tortoise to sleep on a pillow in the bed with us. Yep, like I said, “weird long term couple”. Even worse, when he is in trouble, the tortoise is referred to by his full name, Stoffel Theodore Jeffery.
- You groom and preen each other like monkeys.
Popping zits, pulling unwanted hairs and other unpleasant tasks are actually relaxing while sitting on the couch watching TV.
- Bodily noises are commonplace
Farting, burping and the like are so normal that no one seems to notice them anymore!
- Walking around naked.
You walk around naked throughout the house. Furthermore, no one seems to take notice! Sitting on the couch together watching your favorite show on Crackle in the buff is normal. Checking social media on your phone with only socks on is common.
- Eating with abandon.
Remember how you wouldn’t eat spaghetti or garlic on a first date? Or dare to eat a spinach salad for fear of getting green gunk between your teeth? Well, those days are long gone and replaced by laying in bed in your bathrobe, gorging on a personal pan pizza from Pizza Hut at midnight. Also, your hair is tied up in a scrunchie and you have a clay face mask on.
BONUS: Sharing personal toiletries. Gross as it may seem, we share the same toothbrush. But perhaps this is too much information … no, it is definitely too much info.
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